I woke up one day and I thought, hey, I don’t think I look street enough. I live in South East London – loving fruit & veg markets and Nando’s isn’t enough to stop you getting shanked anymore. I need some clothes that make me look tough!
I’m pretty sure my size is the only thing that has stopped me from getting mugged over and over, but it means NOTHING if you can’t carry off the “Don’t fuck with me” look. Weight, as we all know, does not equal strength. Therefore, you need the big guns.
This jacket is the big guns. I bought it the other day, and at the point of writing, have received no comments on it. Obviously, I have assumed this is because everyone is now scared of me. And that’s the look I was going for. If I could read minds, I’m pretty sure I’d get some positive feedback.
So now I’m James Dean all over, except without the cute hairstyle and grisly death. I really am a rebel without a cause – the only thing I’ve got riled about in the last week is when someone in my office took my chair without asking, and when Transport For London fined me £20. That’s right. I’m a bad-ass. I don’t play by society’s rules.
And I haven’t stopped at the jacket. Today, I have worn it to work with fingerless studded gloves and black leather biker boots from Evans. If you look up “bad” in the dictionary, I’m pretty sure I’d be in there – probably performing an anti-social act, like drinking in a public place, or cattle-rustling.
And all this bad-assery for £24.49, down from £34.99. It’s a gift that keeps on giving.
Forget geek-chic – fashion is rebelling. Don’t forget the knuckle-dusters.
Available in sizes 18-22.